Paying Attention
There’s an old joke that says, “My family was so poor we couldn’t afford to pay attention.” As funny, or not so funny, as you may find that, the truth about paying attention is that it does have a cost to it. Paying attention to important things costs time, focus, fun, self-centeredness, physical effort, comfort, and may involve risk. However, in my experience, the price you might pay for caring about people is nothing compared to the rewards you may receive.
In the process of being alert to what God may be doing in the moment, or just by noticing someone who’s right in front of me, I’ve discovered three important ways to make these encounters become blessings. I call them the three P’s: Being Present, looking for God’s Purpose in and through them, and giving God our Praise & prayers in all things, no matter how hard.
Being Present means truly being attentive to whom you are with and what is going on in the moment. It’s probably one of the least practiced habits in today’s culture. Like me, you may have noticed people who are blatantly ignoring their own family or friends while out for dinner together. Instead of interacting with each other, they are looking down at their cell phones or on a tablet.
In the past several months, I’ve experienced amazing blessings through the simple act of paying attention. Attention to people around me, including people who are serving me—a repair man, food server, housekeeper, or the grocery store clerk, and more. And though it may have meant losing a few minutes of my time, putting away my own cell phone, or going out of my way to notice someone; every single time I did, I was blessed and I’m pretty sure they were too.
Wendy Lieber says it well. “When you pay attention, you’re more present in the moment, you notice things that you might have missed, and you can form deeper connections with the people and experiences around us.” Some of the best blessing’s I’ve experienced have happened by taking time to get to know someone better. Even the act of asking a waiter or waitress what their name is, and followed-up with simple question, can lead to a deeper conversation that makes them feel appreciated and truly seen.
One of my most astounding encounters with a waitress happened a few years ago while traveling through a small unfamiliar town. It began as we finished our meal, and a young gal came out to bus tables. God got my attention first by whispering a nudge for me to “compliment her.” I knew nothing about that young woman so, I decided to study her from a distance. That led me to notice that she looked very similar to a woman in a famous painting, “Girl With the Pearl Earring,” by Vermeer. So, as she got close to our table, I asked her if anyone had ever told her she looked like that model in the painting. Pausing with a glimmer of joy catching her eyes, she responded by saying, “No, but I like to paint.” I was blown away to learn she was also artistic like me. But where it led seconds later, truly amazed me.
She began to tell me her life’s story of abuse and heartache, including the fact that “if her grandmother, hadn’t sent her an airplane ticket and given her a job at the café,” she didn’t know what she would’ve done. Topping it off with her most recent tragic story of losing the baby she and her fiancée were expecting, was the final exclamation point that touched me deeply. “I don’t even know you,” I said with tears puddling in my eyes. “But you’re gonna make me cry.”
I offered to pray with her, and she agreed. My husband was paying our bill at the counter, so, I stood-up, took her hands in mine, and prayed out loud. By that time the restaurant was mostly empty, but God’s presence was surely there. Her response afterwards revealed her heart had been lifted with encouragement.
I am so glad I paid attention to what God said to do that night, and will never forget the joy and blessing I experienced as God’s love flowed between that young woman and I. It was a rare and unexpected opportunity to speak God’s love into a wanting soul. And it wouldn’t have happened if I hadn’t paid attention to God’s voice, and then practiced being present to someone in front of me. His word tells us in Mathew 22:37-38 that the greatest command we can follow is to love God with all our hearts …and to love others as ourselves.” When we pay attention to God’s leading by being present and demonstrating His love to others, we all come to understand His great commandment in a real way.
As we enter the holidays, we’ll likely encounter many people who desperately need to know God’s love and hope. You can encourage others to also pay attention by giving them the gift of my book Fresh Eyes: Seeing God in the Unexpected which is filled with true stories about God revealing Himself through surprising events, trials, and people. Or The Buzz @ Chicky-Pie’s Café, my fiction novel that tells the story of Elise, a young woman who is led to a hopeful, redemptive life through caring people that pay attention to her with loving care. The stories in both books demonstrate that miracles, hope, and blessings, happen when we paying attention God and others. Both books can be ordered through my website on the books page or on amazon.
You might also want to check-out my latest holiday pecan pie demo on my YouTube channel. The demo also includes a redemptive ingredient for holiday stress. Go to: @IrisCarignan-ATasteOfHoney See the recipe for the pecan pie at the bottom of this blog post for your reference too.
The next couple of blog posts will focus on the other two P’s of paying attention-Purpose and Praise. In the meantime, it’s my prayer that God will continue to offer you and I opportunities to be present for someone and allow us to be blessed when we pay attention to the most important matters.
Iris’s Georgia Pecan Pie
Pastry for one-crust Pie, 2 ½ Tablespoons Flour, 2/3 cup sugar, Pinch of salt, 4 eggs lightly beaten, ¼ cup softened butter, 1 ¼ cups corn syrup, one cup pecan halves
Preheat oven to 375 degrees
Line 9 inch pie plate with pastry, Combine flour, sugar & pinch of salt, Combine eggs and butter in a separate bowl. Stir in flour, sugar, & salt mixture & Beat together lightly. Stir in corn syrup then add ¾ cup of the pecans and pour mixture into pastry-lined pie plate. Then add the remaining ¼ pecans to the pie placing them by hand evenly throughout the pie as needed to fill gaps.
Bake in pre-heated oven for 10 minutes at 375, then lower the temperature to 350 F and bake another 50 minutes longer. Check on the pie after 35 or 4 0 minutes to see if you need to place a piece of foil over the edges of the crust to prevent burning. (The filling should rise and thicken as it finishes and not be too liquid or runny when done.) * Let pie cool completely before adding any toppings like whipped cream.
